last night

as we drove to this place, God showed us his promise(not actual pic).

A national Cambodian holiday gave a few of us a week away. We are in a place that draws a lot of tourists. It's supposed to be a retreat of sorts (along the beach), but I feel this place is anything but. We were out for dinner last night when a young Irish man approached us and told us to come to his bar for free drinks. He went on to say they would kick out all the hookers and we wouldn't be bothered. 

WOW! That struck something so deep in me. And tonight, I lay awake hearing music coming from these bars. His words keep running through my head. It's seemed so easy for him to toss them out with his words. We love these women and we would go to these bars because they are there. They are worthy. They have value. They are not hookers or prostitutes. It is what they do but not who they are. 

Something inside of me wanted to speak up for these women...and tonight, I regret not saying anything. However, I know if I had said anything it wouldn't have been said with the love of Christ which compels us to do what we do.

We have seen many women with customers. The look on their faces says it all. They put on a front when the man is looking, but as soon as he turns away, their expression falls. We can see their pain and feel helpless. They need to know they are precious, valuable, and worthy of love. They work to support their families not because they enjoy it. Most of these women have families who need money, have children to feed and put through school, and some are trying to go to school themselves. They are not trash. 

My heart is stirred tonight. God loves these women so much! God open our hearts to love them more.

if only they knew
if only they knew they could break free from this prison
see their worth
to not be bound by the chains that keep them there
to be set free to fly
to pursue their dreams, to know no limits
god if only they knew
you love them
you have paid for their freedom
you have made a way for them
if only they could see beyond this life
to have hope for so much more
to believe there is purpose
to want to wake up each day
not have to sell themselves
but to love themselves
and to love you
to know you
for eternity
to be healed of their brokenness
and to stand

four months.

Four months.
It's been four months since I have written an update.

Well, I could give many excuses as to why I haven't written, but I struggle to express what I feel. Sometimes I don't even know. The things we see are not normal or right but that is why we are here. That is what we are fighting for.

What can we share, so much has happened....I don't know where to start. It has been full of emotional ups and downs. Over and over. 

Lots of transition. 

New culture.

New language. 

Learning. 

Misunderstandings. 

Uncertainty. 

Dreams. 

Community. 

Amazing people. 

Heartbreaking stories. 

Hong Kong. 

Building relationships with organizations, children, mothers, and women in the bars. 

Being humbled. 

Seeking God in prayer and worship. 

Finding our way in ministry and in the city. 

Bargaining for almost everything. 

Seeing God's promises come to pass. 

Seeing teammates step out into what God has called them to do. 

Seeing God use each of us and seeing what He is redeeming in us. 

It's a new chapter. It's exciting. It's crazy. It's different. It's not easy, but it's the beginning of something BIG!

I just pray that people are drawn to Jesus in us. They will experience the love of Jesus through us. They will come to know and accept him. 

I don't always know what to do. I don't feel strong or capable...but praise God that He IS! I just have to trust and continue to walk.

how it all started.

As I was thinking about writing this blog, the lyrics of the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song came to mind:

Now, this is a story all about how

My life got flipped-turned upside down

And I liked to take a minute just sit right there

And I tell you how I became..........................a "missionary" to Cambodia.

I still find it hard to say I am a "missionary". I haven't really done anything, but I am preparing to go to Cambodia. On June 10th, I fly from Portland, Oregon to my new home in Phnom Penh on June12th. Crazy!

How did I get here?

Well, in October 2011, I went to Harvest School, in Mozambique. I came in exhausted, not really sure if I wanted to be in ministry anymore. I was drained and felt like I had nothing left to give. Heidi and Rolland Baker stood before the school and spoke about so much, but the key was being in the presence of God. They have been in ministry a long time. They have been through so many things that would cause most people to question what they are doing and if it is worth it, but God has been so faithful and they continue.

I found rest in the presence of God. It wasn't always easy, but it was good.

Throughout the school, many speakers came and shared. I learned so much and experienced God in new  and powerful ways. He began to change my heart. I used to dream about African children and thought about living there, but I started to see different people in my dreams.  

Jason and Kellie Holbeche came and spoke about the needs in Cambodia, especially for the boys. I started to become undone, and with a few friends, we tearfully prayed for the people and the country that day. 

This is where it began. 

I started seeing Cambodian children playing in my dreams. Girls that had been sexually abused were being brought to us for prayer and we were encountering the Holy Spirit so intensely. Also, I have heard these words spoken in my dreams, "These children are like DIAMONDS, precious and valuable." and "I have set the captive free by discourse."

God has truly been at work in my heart and mind. I would have never guessed that I would be returning to SE Asia or even moving there. But that is the journey God has me on, and for now, all I can do is go. 

Please keep us in your prayers. Our team is assembling and it is an amazing team! God is faithful and so good! 

Love, Amy

Redemption in Thailand

(blog from March 9, 2012)
I am in Pattaya, Thailand and feeling so free and light of the burdens and hurt I carried from my last experience in Thailand. God promised me redemption if I came, and I found it on one of the darkest streets in Pattaya.

Let me back track for a moment. I came to Phuket, Thailand in November 2010, on the World Race. I felt sick and was barely able to stay standing most days. Satan attacked me physically, spiritually, and emotionally everyday. I have never had to fight so hard to get through a month, and I never wanted to return to Thailand.

Never say never to God.

Two months after returning from the WR, I attended Iris Ministries Harvest School in Mozambique. It's a mission training school led by Heidi and Rolland Baker. I was so confused why I was there. I didn't want to do ministry. I didn't want to be around so many people. I didn't want to be around children(that was the big shocker). However, over the course of two months, God restored me and was preparing me to return to SE Asia.

"I am not strong enough God! I can't do it!" I said through my tears. I was afraid.

God showed me that this was why he is taking me back, because I can't do it alone. I need to depend on him. The Iris team is setting up a base in Thailand and Cambodia. I feel God calling me to serve in Cambodia, but he wanted me to come to Thailand first.

I went through the same motions, why am I here...God, I don't understand?

The first week in Bangkok was hard; I felt the spiritual warfare much differently. It was subtle and deceptive. Our team split and I came to Pattaya with eight others. The other night, we went near Walking Street(a street with lots of bars), to visit The Bridge, a center for children to come at night while their parents are working in the bars. It was there that everything changed. We prayed over a little girl, who has CP. I got to hold her and help her eat. Something broke off me in the spirit, I felt it, and my team noticed. I can't explain it. I felt joy, peace, and love for this little girl and found redemption for Thailand in my heart. It came in the form of a child.


The next night we went to worship and walk through the bars on Soi 6, I saw hope and light for the first time. God is redeeming Thailand and has brought redemption to me. He delivers on his promises.

The darkness will not have a hold on this place much longer! Praise the Lord as he continues to do MARVELOUS things!!